I am going to play out two scenarios that I have done in the past that has significantly improved my confidence in a relatively short matter of time. The first reenactment will be the BEFORE, the second will be the AFTER. Compare to your own thoughts and judgements to see where you can improve much further beyond me!
1st Reenactment — so there I was about to walk into the coffee shop and all the seats facing the door, I think to myself “omg everybody is going to stare at me, I am going to do something foolish, I don’t feel ready”. I open the door, head down, head straight to cashier, place my order with minimum human interaction barely making eye contact while my entire insides feel like there’s a combat zone of judgment and ill feelings blowing up.
2nd Reenactment — I get to the coffee shop and think these people are like me, they are my friends, they are friendly. I open the door with a smile, walk in smooth and comfortably. As I approach the counter I nod and grin to others who grin back, I politely talk with the cashier and give my order. I feel connected, at peace, effortless.
Massive difference here my friends, and very easy to recognize. Our thoughts directly play into how we perceive ourselves and others. This can be based on what our parents, schools, experience has taught us — but it can also be predetermined from a lineage of survival among the species.
Luckily, for us humans we are so sophisticated we can literally evolve out of negative thought patterns. Yes, you read that correctly, yes that’s why you are amazing, but no… not special. Special is a term I save for those who are able to genuinely represent themselves while helping others do the same.
By working towards loving and appreciating yourself more and more (goes hand in hand with forgiveness and compassion) you will open up a world of intensely glorious humility that brings a mysterious interstellar paradise.
PRACTICE- the more you practice this throughout the day the faster you will evolve into a happier more loving person. This can be used anywhere at any time but is most helpful for stressful situations.
1st- remind yourself “I am a worthwhile person, I am awesome, I am good, I am loveable, I am, etc.”. Mini affirmations spread out throughout the day significantly brings you back to home-base.
2nd- when an undesirable event occurs or a nasty thought pops up, Label it! This is significant because it creates separation, I have this thought but I am not this thought. Somebody was mean to me but I am not their statement “I cannot be defined and limited by words”.
3rd- shower the moment with compassion (Not Easy — level Master) this means when you feel hurt, judged, belittled, stepped on, you find a silver lining, a miniscule of truth, and love up on the entirety that took place (life is too short to bitch & moan & resist). This also directly points you towards work you need to do if you find yourself reacting and blaming.
4th- we are all human, none of us are perfect and that makes life the Great Perfection
Enjoy this simple practice and feel the warm sweetness of compassion.
Good luck my friend,
Tyler D.
