Freakishly fond feelings? How to create a wonderful relationship with yourself

Photo by Hello I'm Nik on Unsplash

So, there I was contemplating the nature of my confusion and anger. I’m upset at the fact that I’m upset, without reason. Just in a mood, I tell myself. But why is it that certain people or times cause us to spiral into funks or is it truly our own doing. In this post you will understand the underlying current of emotion that sways us to feel up or down, in or out.

If you have ever felt numb, out of place, and disordered about the internal workings of your emotions and thoughts this article is going to try to shed some light on what the hell is going on.

If you want to comprehend your current state, analyze your thoughts and try to trace them to the root you will discover some extreme complexities. This is done in a lot of therapists’ offices, shadow work, and meditation exercises. To get to the root is to solve the problem, for good!

If you are like me and it is a new world to stop and feel into your emotions, a bizarre occurrence that happens so often and subtly, it is easy to miss. My god what a world opens up when you STOP and realize, “holy smackers! I don’t even know what is happening in my own body” like seriously wtf. My heart hurts, my blood feels on fire, my stomach feels queasy — just from sitting in traffic? Like what the heck is going on here.

In order to be a true master of yourself, understand how you operate (with no manual) words don’t do justice, the literal only answer is to explore your inner workings like a scientist. To sit and feel, stop and think, look from every angle something that typically you do not see. TO Be. TO Feel. To Is? Just I Amness — I am experiencing. I am witnessing. I am. Holy moly my friend, go into the depths of your “soul” to discover a world beyond meaning. It is beneficial to write down the thoughts and continue on a stream of Now, what if that were true? Next thought, and if that were true? Next, and so on until you unravel a ball of string that is your very identity (shit just got real).

This mumbo jumbo may just be your key to unlocking your happiness, your wisdom, the deepest insight that can be gathered, only from direct experience. You MUST realize (as we all must at some point) that we do not know shit about ourselves. It is the humble fall that requires us to open up to the unknown and release the reigns of “illusionary control”.

I believe that all these feelings are pointers to what our intuition tells us is “right” or “wrong” meaning more specifically what is the path for us. How we decide to move forward or stay stuck. Take action from a place of weakness or courage. To think just about us or be as inclusive as possible.

To mature is to act like a grown up, right? The most mature person you know usually isn’t a selfish one, but a compassionate one. In my experience this can only occur after lengthy periods of selfishness and suffering. Usually caused by us in the form of ruminating, twisted thinking, victim mentality, and blaming.

When we feel sorry for ourselves, feel like a heaping pile of stinky garbage, the only way out is to show us and others deep compassionate love — truly transforming the way we perceive our reality. When we feel helpless and out of control and hurt so damn bad it makes us cry, we can berate ourselves into further misery OR a better option is to FORGIVE and Let GO.

Miraculous mood enhancement = Forgive thyself

Straight up works wonders in every way imaginable, try it out now. Feeling blue? Girlfriend dumped you? Lost your wallet? Forgive yourself, the error, the repercussions, the other person, the day, let it all get wrapped in a warm blanket of approval and satisfaction. Its just that easy right?

Wrongo! Yes, it feels incredible, even orgasmic, to forgive thyself completely. But don’t be like me! For so many damn years, I was like “oh, no its cool” (I thought to myself) I can mess up as much as I want and I won’t feel like a jackass! Whoo hoo! And some people need this knowledge, don’t get me wrong, but even more useful…

Learn why you acted or felt how you did in the first place! This involves the uncomfortable sit and look as mentioned previously to squish out the subconscious reasons behind your actions. This can take time, but I guarantee you if you sit long enough the truth will reveal itself. Whether it be to fit in, not feel humiliated, to just get by, we all do things by default (path of least resistance) when we are tired, jumbled, or in zombie-mode.

It is my personal goal to take every interaction, conversation, deed I do to quickly (not overly) analyze the outcome and thought process. Not to dwell but to determine if that is how I want to proceed, on my path, to Mastering my Mentality.

Hey friend I hope this article help shed some light on interacting with our feelings and behaviors, tell a buddy and save a homie. Until next time — stay Alert!

Tyler D.



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Tyler D

Tyler D

I am a personal trainer who focuses on strengthening the body AND mind. I like to help people improve their self-image AND self-esteem.